I was recently dashing through the local superstore, on a tight schedule but in need of ingredients for dinner, when I noticed some cute clothes in the ladies’ apparel section out of the corner of my eye. Since I was in a hurry, I didn’t take the time to look very closely, but the colors and the styles caught my attention, so I slowed from a hustle to a brisk walk to inspect more closely. It was then that I realized I was eyeing up workout clothes.
Friends, workout clothes are not my friend. My body does not do any favors to tight-fitting anything. Even before two pregnancies resulting in three babies, I was too self-conscious to embrace what I had to feel comfortable with every flaw not only on display, but amplified.
My mind working as it does, this is the thought process that followed:
“Wow, those are some really cute workout clothes! I should work out so I can wear the cute workout clothes. But, wait, I’d need to lose at least ten pounds before I could even consider putting on body-hugging spandex so I could work out. But…how am I going to lose weight so I can work out if I can’t work out until I lose weight?”
Clearly, that battle was lost before it even started. Therefore, here I am, still not working out, or workout ready. What can I say?
It was a crazier than normal summer around here, and we still haven’t slowed down much yet. Unfortunately, sometimes my hurrying leads to disasters. Take this week, for example: I dropped the twins off at preschool on Tuesday and had two and a half hours to squeeze in some desperately needed grocery shopping before I had to pick them up. Travel time for the good stores is about 20 minutes both ways, and I wanted to make a quick trip to TJ Maxx for a really cute outfit I’d seen there last week, and a buffalo check table runner, so I can practice what I preach. That left me with an hour and fifty minutes to do all I wanted to do. A Starbucks PSL was waving from the finish line.
I was perfectly on schedule leaving Sam’s Club, and was patting myself on the back after loading the car with enough food to feed a small army…or, three little boys…for the next couple of weeks. I closed the back of the car…and immediately that pat on the back turned to a kick in the ass. Because, after all these years of being absolutely diligent about knowing where my car keys are at all times when traveling with kids, the one day I didn’t have the kids, I locked the keys in the car.
My first text was to my mom. This, of course, is completely illogical, since she lives two and a half hours away, but they don’t say “Keep Calm and Call your Mom” for nothing, right? Next contact was with Ryan, who had just texted me to ask how I was doing with shopping. Bless the man, he left work to come sit with me in the parking lot. He couldn’t have made it home to get the spare keys and get back to me in time for me to get home and pick up the boys. And so, my final contact was my aunt, who left a pedicure in order to rescue me.
Obviously, I didn’t make it to TJ Maxx or the Starbucks drive thru- but I was on time for school pickup, so it wasn’t a total fail.
Time just keeps moving, and most of the time I’m just running around in cuticles. The good news is, maybe that’ll be how I lose enough weight to flaunt those cute workout clothes.